Two-year-old pilots

Results of something rolled across his spiral notebook, and Rock read them as he lay in bed. They were confusing, but his first notion was that they represented some sort of bizarre report concerning test flights taken by prospective two-year-old airline pilots.
He realized after a moment that there was no denying what he read, and it was clear that all of the pilots had received superior marks, but he couldn't help but wonder what airline would hire near-infants to fly its planes. He imagined the sight of two-year-old children dressed in captain's uniforms and the reaction of passengers as they watched them walk aboard. This couldn't be right.
Short notes by each test flight indicated the pilots' readiness. One read, "Can't fail." Another: "Appeared eager to race."
Of course. That must be it. Rock's confusion began to clear, or at least he hoped. Surely he was reading reports on two-year-old thoroughbreds, not pilots. That must be it.

Donald Trump

Donald Trump called Rock early on a Thursday morning, well before daybreak, to ask if he would guide him on a tour of Levy. He said he spoke to editors at the newspaper. "They recommended you," he said.
Rock agreed, but when he woke up at sunrise remembered he had already planned a trip to see his mother in Nashville. He knew his oversight could mean trouble, so was consequently relieved when the sugar from a Halloween-size PayDay bar at last kicked in.

The Moody Blues

Rock joined friends Joe and Sonny at a bar on Dickson Street in Fayetteville. When he arrived, there was a band playing from a stage in an adjacent room. Their song ended, and Joe turned to Rock. "All right, man, it's your turn," he said.
"Do what?"
"We're playing a game, Rock," Sonny explained. "The whole bar is. When it's your turn, which it is right now, you read the name of the band on the album cover right there in front of you, and if that band happens to be here, they'll play whatever song you want."
Rock just then noticed a tattered 1960s Moody Blues album cover between his arms on the table. People Rock's age commonly kept records like this packed away by the hundreds in attics and garages all around the civilized world.
"Just announce to the bar something like, 'Are the Moody Blues here?' " Sonny said. "And don't be embarrassed. Everyone in here's been doing it all night."
"OK," Rock said, and then loudly. "Are the Moody Blues here?"
He was confident they would be, but he heard no immediate response and was disappointed after a walk through the two rooms and a glance at the stage revealed they weren't.

Too much to ask

An old acquaintance of his named Hugh asked Rock if he would help pace him through a 1000-meter indoor track race. Although perfectly untrained, Rock said he would, and then spent the rest of the day wondering whether he was at all capable.
Hugh, a seventy-year-old former age-group running star, needed to complete the race in 3 minutes, 48 seconds or less in order to qualify for an unspecified championship event. Rock later ran the numbers and became nearly certain he couldn't help beyond perhaps half the distance, particularly after he calculated that a 3:48 would require him to run at exactly a 38-minute 10K pace.
Rock stepped onto a 160-yard indoor track in an old abandoned warehouse to test his legs, and he wasn't at all surprised by their deadness. He was, however, a bit disappointed to find that not only was he incapable of completing 1000 meters at the pace Hugh needed but that he furthermore could not run the required speed at all, not even for a few steps.

God's Record Book

A group of runners and volunteers from the Arkansas Traveller 100-Miler were gathered in a dark, dingy motel room. Rock and fellow Little Rock Hasher Tiny Tim Biggs were among them.
Rock and Tim stood near the door, away from the others. "I wonder what the farthest is anyone has ever run non-stop," Rock said.
"Do what?" Tim said.
"You know. How far has anyone ever run without fucking stopping?"
"I don't have any idea."
"This is why we need God's Record Book."
Several bystanders were suddenly nearby and looked at Rock as if he were insane.
"What are you talking about?" Tim said.
Rock explained that if there was some omnipotent entity, surely he could put together and publish a list of every single record, including the furthest anyone had ever run without stopping.
Tim mentioned that at least three Traveller winners said they ran every step of the course.
"Sure," Rock responded. "But you know they stopped at least for a moment at a few aid stations. For one thing, they have to get weighed a few times."

A few questions

There wasn't much to ask. Rock already had most of what he would need to put together a notes package on the University of Central Arkansas football program, but he was in a cloakroom when the head coach walked in.
Rock decided to ask a few questions about the previous Saturday's game that he knew nothing about.
"Coach, what are your thoughts about the game?" he said.
"Well, you know, obviously we were disappointed, but we gave it our best," the coach said. He spoke softly and looked somewhat angered.
It occurred to Rock moments later that the team was on a bye week and hadn't played. He didn't know what to think.